Carseats and the selection process can be as difficult as a 400 pound man walking into a Krispy Kreme and not snorting down a half dozen. There are a million with all sorts of funny names, chicco, graco, peg perego, eggo ( ok , last one is the waffle brand) and they all do different things. We have read the reviews and safety concerns and we went with the Mico Maxi-Cosi. It looked cool and the safety reviews were great. We were lucky enough to get the car seat at our Baby shower from our Grandma Carolyn, Grandma Ada and our Aunt Beth. When Megan and I decided to test out the car seat in our small car ( 2 seater IS250Lexus) we had some problems. The base was REALLY big and the seat had problems latching into place. After going back online and reading more reviews we learned that we were not the only ones with the issue. So my advice to any parents to be is when shopping for a seat, grab the seat from the store and pop it in your car. If we would have done that with this model we would have seen the problems early on. Here are some shots of us testing with a test baby in place of our future one. And yes Megan knows I have put these pictures up and she doesn't care. At this point she figures "Aw what the hell! I am embracing my pregnancy weight gain!". I am proud of her for that.
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So unfortunately we are going to have to return it and find another. We have found a couple of options and I will let you know when we decide which one. I am sure you will be sitting on the edge of your seats to find out.;)
Why I feel guilty...
As I await the birth of my first child I pay so much more attention to babies and children I see in public now. How they act, what they look like, the good and bad things they do. I wonder how my child will be and how healthy physically and mentally it will be. When I see "bad" kids I wonder how much of that is from the child and how much is from the parenting. I know not all cases usually the parent carries most of the blame. 9 times out of 10, bad parent, bad kid.
But, when I see a baby or child with a permanent disease or physical handicap, I can't help to think "I really hope my child doesn't have that." I hate thinking that. I hate feeling bad or pity for someone who doesn't want it. But I do. I also feel guilty for even thinking that but I think it is probably a natural reaction for someone expecting their first baby. I know that if something happens and we have to deal with a tough situation we will. I know we will still love our baby regardless. But it is the not knowing that is killing me. I saw a cute little boy with Tourettes today, he must have been 8 or 9. His father was so nice and patient with him, the kid seemed so sweet that i just wanted to give him a hug. I know his father would not want me to feel bad for him but, it is in my nature to want to make people feel good, especially those who really deserve it.
Thankfully Megan's pregnancy has gone fine with no real complications. I hope and pray the delivery and our baby's health will go just as smooth. This is not a judgement on any parents of children with disabilities or the children themselves. It is nothing more than a real and honest observation about myself.
I can't wait for the day when you become a proud father. You inspire me to be the best person I can be, and I've only known you for a short time. Your soon-to-be son or daughter is about to become the luckiest kid in the world. I can't imagine the greatness your child is sure to acheive with your inspirations, encouragement, and overall awesomeness.
ReplyDeleteWith that said, hoping your child turns out healthy and "normal" is nothing to feel guilty about. Every (good) parent hopes that the child turns out the best that they can be, or at least better than the parents themselves are. It's human nature.
Thanks Anthony! That was really nice and I truly appreciate the kind words.
ReplyDeleteDaddy-o! Nice post with a mix between humor and seriousness. Your story of the son and father together reminded me of this sweet son and father who I have seen a few times sit a few pews in front of me at church. I cry every time that son with Down Syndrome lays his head on his dad's shoulder while the dad just let's him snuggle. Who needs a sermon when you just witnessed love in action....I look forward to seeing you & Megan love on your perfect baby, too!
ReplyDeleteHey Los...
ReplyDeleteI immediately thought of our shoot and the questions you had about Xanders seizure disorder when I read this. Just know that what you are feeling is COMPLETELY normal. I think all soon to be/new parents see other people with various challanges they face and it is only natural to think "oh gosh... I hope that doesn't happen with MY kid." David and I freaked out a little bit when we found out that Xander is not "perfect" and has this condition... but I also know that God wont give us more than we can handle and I STILL see other people dealing with other more serious conditions and breathe a sigh of relief that we don't deal with that. When all of this came to light I have never felt so supported by folks facebooking me to find out how he is doing and how we are doing... Just know that no matter what happens you are going to have the most amazing little being in your life very soon and you can't wrap yourself up in the "what ifs" even though it is so hard not to. You have a great support network and I just know that you and Megan will be absolutely amazing parents. I believe that the number one way to be a great parent is having a sense of humor and you and Megan definately have that in spades :) One other *unsolicited* tip... every new parent is told that any drugs to make the mom more comfortable during labor will stall out her labor and you should wait it out... Those people are dirty communist liars and you should completely disregard this advice. I waited 16 hours on Piticin with no meds and dilated to a whopping 1/2 centimeter... so I tracked down the lady who told me that and set her on fire. (last part not true lol- just thought I would take a page out of your comedy book :).
New to your blog, I've really enjoyed reading through the archives & looking forward to hearing about your new baby! I love the sweet & honest emotions you're not afraid to write out here.
ReplyDeleteAfter reading this post, I just have to point out that I'm sure no matter how "healthy" your kid is, it won't affect at all how much you love him or her-- look at how you reacted to the boy with Tourette's! You wanted to give him a hug!
Really looking forward to reading along with your journey as a new father and expecting to learn a lot from you on how to be a compassionate & loving parent. Hope everything went great with the delivery!